Premiere League 2019

Nacho Premiere League 2019

This year NPL returns with just a touch more planning, in order that it’s even more annoying when we disregard the rules altogether.

The NPL setup has FOUR goals:

  1. Everyone, no matter how fit or fat, has a reason to ride hard.
  2. Everyone knows what’s going on, gets into it, team tactics n’ shit.
  3. It’s relatively easy to score, while drunk.
  4. It Discourages bullshit / riding like a butthole


  • Your NPL team will stay (mostly) persistent for each 4-week season.
  • Starting teams will be balanced as best we can.
  • Riders can be traded at any time, subject to league approval.
  • Each rider has a designated position, which determines handicap (see scoring details).
  • Not on a team? Just show up, we’ll set you up.

General Scoring

  • Game: The top three scores of the weekly game get league points
    • 1st: 10pts
    • 2nd: 6pts
    • 3rd: 3pts
  • PR: Riders score league points for PRs on the four significant segments (Fletcher, Parker, Zeeb, SGMGR). PRs do not count on your first Nachoride.
    • PR = 2pts
  • Prime: 2pts awarded for each prime sign (Fletcher, Parker, Zeeb)
  • Best of the Rest: 2 league points for the Wagner Stop Ahead from the main group.
  • Not Last: 1 league point for not being last.

Rider Scoring

Each team must have at least one rider of each position, each week. If you’re short a GC or Sprinter, you can sub a Domestique. GC and Sprinters cannot downgrade to Domestique.

  • General Classification Rider: GC Riders must complete the SGMGR segment in under 25 minutes.
    • >25:00 = -5 league points
    • >26:00 = -10 league points
    • <24:00 = +5 league points
    • KOM = +10 league points
  • Sprinters: Sprinters must be in the top 5 at each prime or lose 2 league points (each fail)
  • Domestiques: Domestiques earn +2 league points for each section they stay with the main group (as arbitrarily and hastily defined).


  • June 5th: Nacho Classic 10 (top ten place = score, primes -2, lowest wins)
  • May 12th: Nacho Classic 10 (top ten place = score, primes -2, lowest wins)
  • May 19th: Nacho Classic 10 (top ten place = score, primes -2, lowest wins)
  • May 26th: TTT (teams start in reverse order w/gaps based on points, 2nd person counts, real position wins)